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Mums Unstuck
22 Sept, 18:37
Swipe slidesWhen I found out I was going to be a mother 21 years ago, I had all these BIG ideas about the kind of parent I’d be and the relationship I’d have with my children…And then reality hit…. It’s not as easy as you think it’s going to be when you’re sleep deprived and alone in the house with the kids!No one tells you that when you haven’t experienced a “healthy” childhood yourself, it’s pretty hard to figure out what “healthy” parenting actually looks like.And that’s why you have to know this work you’re doing isn’t easy ukhti. But it is absolutely worth it. And the fruits of your labour will pay off insha’Allah.You are what we call the Transitional Character. A Transitional Character is the first person in a family to do something. It could be the 1st person to become Muslim, the 1st person to attend university, or as we are looking at here, the first person to breakMums Unstuck
22 Sept, 18:36
Mums Unstuck
22 Sept, 18:36
Mums Unstuck
22 Sept, 11:07
Imagine one of your kids run into you. You’ll probably ask “are you okay honey?” as they look up at you with a smile saying “yes muma”Imagine again your child runs into you, only this time you have a broken legThis time, with the pain of that fractured wound, you’ll let out an uncontrollable scream in pain from the collision and push your child immediately awayThe difference in responses is stark!When you find yourself feeling triggered by your children, it usually isn’t your child you’re reacting to; it’s often an emotional wound that they have unintentionally ran into that was ALREADY there. And it is this emotional wound that is triggering your reactionDoes that make sense?Something you have to know is the majority of mumas you see who adopted the the idea of the intentional parenting way, DIDN’T start their motherhood journey in itWhat led them towards it, is theirMumsunstuckMums UnstuckIntentional Parenting and personal growth for Muslim mums! END the generational cycles that keep you yelling and shaming your children AND yourself!Mums Unstuck
22 Sept, 11:07
Mums Unstuck
21 Sept, 09:59edited
I’m going to continue to say this until people start listening…..Your anger is NOT a discipline tool!When you become aggressive (becauee that is what anger does) it is incredibly intimidating and frightening to your children…You think by shouting blue-murder it will show the kids how serious you are and how “wrong” their actions were so they will stopThe problem when you’re angry is children’s brains don’t take in the lesson you think you’re teaching ….Instead it goes into survival mode.Their stress hormones spike, and they focus on escaping the perceived threat: which in that moment is YOU.Instead of learning to listen, they learn to fear. Instead of feeling safe, they feel the need to escape and hide. Instead of learning what the right thing is to do, they learn to get better at not getting caught!So, what’s the alternative?You have to know what you can do toMums Unstuck
21 Sept, 09:59
Mums Unstuck
20 Sept, 10:13edited
How do you homeschool a toddler? You don't!A two year old doesn't need homeschooling any more than a 2 year old needs school. A two year old simply need parenting.I look back to when my eldest was a toddler. I remember the anticipation and excitement to teach this little girl of mine everything, to make her be the best she can be inshaAllah. To put her ahead.She was barely out of nappies, yet in my mind I was trying to set her up to be ready to begin a PhD. So I get it. I can completely relate to this question, because l've been there myself with my own children.I totally get your enthusiasm, and your desire to help your child towards success bilithnillah. Especially if this is your first child (usualy this enthusiasm for teaching a two year old is because he is your first born....usually).Let me assure you the time for homeschooling around the kitchen table will come. ThoseMumsunstuckMums UnstuckIntentional Parenting and personal growth for Muslim mums! END the generational cycles that keep you yelling and shaming your children AND yourself!Mums Unstuck
20 Sept, 10:13
Mums Unstuck
19 Sept, 15:02
🖤 We LOVE seeking out proactive Muslim mumas ready to ditch quick fixes that don’t stick and build positive lasting change starting with YOU.👉It’s not just a parenting membership... It’s an ongoing personal journey to raise yourself, disguised as parenting support.✔️We know what you WANT is help handling the everyday parenting chaos with the kids.... and we give you that.✔️We also know what you NEED is help building the connection with yourself first. So we give you that too.People are (pleasantly) surprised when they join us to find 80% of what we do has nothing to do with the kids and everything to do with you...YOUR fears YOUR BIG feelings YOUR actions YOUR behaviours YOUR needs YOUR challenges YOUR nervous system🧀Because as cheesy as this might sound (sometimes we need the cheese), you are the beating heart of your home, and when you feel okay, the house is okay withMums Unstuck
19 Sept, 15:02
Mums Unstuck
19 Sept, 11:25
This might ruffle some feathers becauee not everyone likes to hear this…I hear this a lot: “My husband parent’s differently”. And what you really mean, is he isn’t doing it the way you would (smiles)What I want to highlight is that yes, you do absolutely want to be on the same page as your husband and stand as a united front together in front of the children, because any differences do impact what your children learn is expected.HOWEVERKeep in mind that as a mother, YOU are your children’s primary caregiver, NOT their father. It’s YOU who your children are with the majority of the time. And it is YOU who plays the more active nurturing role. That’s just facts.One mistake I see we make as women, especially living in the West where we’ve been raised with the idea that men and women are “the same” in every sense and ignoring biology, psychology and physiology, is we startMums Unstuck
19 Sept, 11:25
Mums Unstuck
18 Sept, 14:58
ALL of us want our children to THRIVE insha'Allah, and EVERYONE ecognises the importance of the early years....regardless of whether you're planning to home educate or school your family.One question I see come up all the time is "How do I homeschool my 2/3 year old?" from stressed out mumas who are concerned their child doesn't want to sit still and "learn".(Spoiler alert.... you don't homeschool a preschooler! You PARENT them.)Our main event for September inside our membership community is exploring how you can support your pre-school age children at home.... and it is the SAME for everyone, regardless of whether you're planning to home-educate OR school.To join us LIVE this Sunday, all you need to do is join Mums Unstuck https://mumsunstuck.comSee you there!MumsunstuckMums UnstuckIntentional Parenting and personal growth for Muslim mums! END the generational cycles that keep you yelling and shaming your children AND yourself!Mums Unstuck
18 Sept, 14:58
Mums Unstuck
18 Sept, 14:30
When so many of us are living with internalised self-doubt, trust is a pretty bold concept to look at. Because how can you trust your children or trust yourself when you have the silent niggling voice at the back your head, constantly questioning "Am I doing the right thing?"Let me tell you something ukhti that I myself was told when my eldest child was only 6....That voice of doubt never goes away until the kids grow up, so get COMFORTABLE being UNcomfortable.Do you know why you're constantly second guessing everything you do? It's because this is the first time you've been a mother.And with your eldest especially, you are ALWAYS in that first-time mother zone, because it is the first time you have been a parent of a 1 year old, or a 4 year old, or 7 year old, or 10 year old or 16 year old.....Your eldest is your first try, and you have no way to know how this will all turnMums Unstuck
18 Sept, 14:30
Mums Unstuck
18 Sept, 09:36
Swipe slides 👆I was talking to a mum in today’s drop-in, about whether she should start homeschooling her 6 year old.One of the things she asked was should she spend more time researching and reading and understand homeschool before she starts….I told her you will NEVER be ready. You don’t figure it all out UNTIL you start doing it!Talk to as many home educators as you can, to help you build a picture of what educating without school looks likeLet me tell you in case you haven’t already heard, said that to become an “expert” in anything, you need to spend 10,000 hours working on it; 20 hours a week over ten years.When it comes to home education, there is no degree to certify you as a home educator, there is no special training to prepare you for this role. Rather it is something learned through experience. Through doing. And home educating Mummas have reached 10,000 hoursMumsunstuckMums UnstuckReady to start building the Muslim homeschool of your dreams? 16-weeks of hand-holding as you work through this transformative self-paced programmes for Muslim mums like you.Mums Unstuck
18 Sept, 09:33
Mums Unstuck
17 Sept, 21:43
Swipe slides 👆One of the FIRST things I’ll ask you about when you come asking how to “fix behaviour” issues, is how much time are you spending with your children?And I don’t mean time in the same space, breathing the same air. I mean time actually hanging out and doing something fun or exciting or meaningful, together.Whether your child is a todler or teen, I’ll be asking you how much quality time are you really getting AND how consistent is it?Don’t even think about trying to resolve any behaviour issues if you’re not spending time together.A MASSIVE mistake I see again and again and again by adults, is the idea that you have a relationship with a child just because you are the parent or the aunty…. Nope, no you do not!Yes in the technical sense, there’s a parent-child relationship there. Or aunty - niece/neohewBut in the truest sense of what it means to HAVE a
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